Untangling the Mother Wound
For daughters learning to trust themselves again.

Take this slowly. You don’t need to have the answers. The only requirement is honesty and self-compassion. Choose 1–2 prompts at a time, and return as often as you need.

1. What parts of myself did I feel I had to hide to be accepted or loved as a child?

Was it my sadness? Anger? Sensitivity? Independence? Ask yourself where you started to shrink — and why.

2. What did I crave from my mother that I never fully received?

Was it emotional warmth? Encouragement? Protection? Curiosity about who I really was?

3. When I picture my mother’s love, does it feel safe — or does it come with conditions?

(Example: Did I have to perform, agree, stay quiet, or succeed in order to be seen?)

4. What roles did I take on in childhood to emotionally survive?

(The caretaker, the achiever, the invisible one…?) Are those roles still playing out in my adult life?

5. What do I fear will happen if I set a boundary, disappoint, or say no?

Whose voice is that fear echoing — hers, or mine?

6. What does my version of mothering look like — the kind I didn’t get, but needed?

Describe how you would speak to your younger self today. How would you comfort her?

7. What new belief am I ready to build about myself and my worth?

Let it be something you choose — not something you inherited.

Closing Prompt:

“The version of me that was shaped by survival is…”
And
“The version of me I am becoming is…”